I triple dog dare ya!

My Christmas tradition.. I eat as much as I can. Then I turn on TBS. Then every now and again I awake from my food coma to watch a different section of A Christmas Story. Happy Holidays!

The other day at Starbucks...

it got very loud..

Dinosaurs!!

Earlier this month we went to the L.A. county fair.

It was here we found this awesome exhibit. Jurassic World! ROOOOAAAAAR!

It was like you could walk right up and pet them.

This guy here is called the half-mouth. He's a herbivore.

And now we have another theory of what really happen to these giant beasts.

ROAR!

Fish Hooks!

Check out my first episode of Fish Hooks! It's called "Dores Flores Gorgeous" and it premiers this Friday at 9 pm on the Disney Channel. It stars Emilio Estevez, Judd Nelson, and Molly Ringwald...

1,062,800

Congrats goes to the real life super villain, Billy Mitchell. Not only does he still have awesome hair, but he has also reclaimed the Donkey Kong high score.

The most unhappy family in the world

just so happened to be spending their 4th of July at the Montrose car show not enjoying themselves. I ran into this lovely family when my friend Noah was trying to take his son on a kiddie car ride. The angry mother cut in front of him and threw her angry daughter into the ride.

She sat as the ride shook around in silence not cracking a smile once. Her angry parents stared off into space.

Later they had dissatisfying barbeque...

They finished the holiday off watching fireworks

wishing they were better.

The only reason I knew about the rest of their day is because I followed them home.

Just the other day...

Don't worry... She pedaled off happy and green.

The Cookie Story

So in honor of mother's day I decided to share a story that I've told a million times. My mom loves sharing it too. Definitely one of my prouder moments...

I was a pudgy two year old who loved his cookies.

After my sixth or seventh cookie, my mom decided I had enough.

So she put the cookies into the refrigerator...

Which was one of the best places to hide food from me -

because I was too little to open it.

It looked like I was doomed to a boring cookieless afternoon -

When I saw my window of opportunity.

My mom had fallen asleep!

Then I noticed the mailman dropping off mail! I only had seconds to react.

Quickly I grabbed the mailman by the hand, and waddled him into the kitchen to retrieve my cookies.

My mom awoke to witness my cookie victory and a slightly embarrassed mailman standing in our living room. Happy Mother's Day!

Little kids are awesome!

This sounds like a bad stand up joke... So I was at the DMV the other day...

And I saw these two little kids. They were really excited to see each other and wanted to introduce themselves. But they didn't want to do the ordinary, everyday hand shake.

So they decided to go with much more intimate eye ball rub.

Now they will be friends forever!

T-BALL!

Spring makes me think about baseball. And baseball makes me think about t-ball. And t-ball makes me think about a little boy named, David C.  David  was on my little brother's t-ball team. He was my favorite player to watch. I can remember every one of David's at-bats. That's because they all ended the exact same way...

David would walk up to the tee already looking sad and dejected.  Then in an unorthodox approach, David would run past the tee and swing as he went by.

Then the all the kids playing 3rd base would chase after the ball. (NOTE: There were usually about 35 kids playing the field.)   

David ran down the base line.

Finally, one of the 3rd basemen would grab the ball and throw it past the 1st basemen.

David would still be making his way there.

The 1st basemen would grab the ball and go back to first base...

Still beating David there.

David would finally reach the bag already crying -

then dramatically throw himself to the ground -

completely crushed that yet another base hit alluded him.

David's mom would then assist him off the field and let him know how close he was that time.

Nap Time...

the flight home...

This is what happens when you get stuck with the aisle seat in the back of a plane about a half hour after drinks are served....... They're, they're waiting for the lavatory.